On: Trump says Canada wants 'benefits of being a state' as trade war deepens

August 24, 2026.

Well, the President says Canada wants the benefits of being a state without being one. I had to read that twice. Then I read it a third time, and I’m still not sure which side of the fence he thinks they’re standing on.

Now I don’t know much about geography - I’ve been lost in every country I ever visited - but my understanding was that Canada has been minding its own business up there for going on two centuries. They didn’t ask to join. They didn’t apply. They’ve got their own flag, their own Prime Minister, and their own weather, which is the worst of the three bargains if you ask me.

And here’s the part that tickles me: we spent years trying to get Puerto Rico to be a state, and they keep voting on it like it’s a raffle ticket nobody wants to draw. Meanwhile we’ve got a whole nation of neighbors who never entered the contest, and now we’re mad at them for not winning it.

The trade talks fell through, so both sides slapped tariffs on each other. That’s how it works now. Two countries that share the longest peaceful border on earth, arguing over who pays extra for lumber and maple syrup. I’ve seen two ranchers fight over a fence line for so long neither one noticed the creek moved and took half the pasture with it.

Carney put his tariffs on. Trump put his on. Both men went home and told their people they won. That’s the oldest trick in politics - you can lose the cow and still claim you got the milk, as long as your own crowd doesn’t look in the barn.

I say let Canada be Canada. They’re good neighbors. They burn our Hollywood pictures, buy our wheat, and apologize when we bump into them. You can’t rope a man into being family. All you can do is leave the gate open and hope he wanders in on his own.

Probably won’t happen. Gates just aren’t what they used to be.